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The Right Honourable Hot Kelly Rittenhouse


The Rt. Hon. Hot Kelly and her handmaids, circa 1580/1858/2007

Kelly Rittenhouse:1561 - 2012



Countess Tolloler; Baroness of Paisley The Moon




Of Hot Kelly, as will may have been at being written in The Continuing Adventures of Paisley Glen

Young Kelly, before her conquest of the Moon.


"Kelly Rittenhouse, known since her first appearance in the Glen's sphere of influence as "Hot Kelly," has since proven her ... spiciness by her violent,
bloody conquest of Paisley The Moon. The Mooninites, having captured HSM Edmund (knowing him only as the Baron Munchausen), imprisoned and
tortured His Majesty using a variety of diabolical devices. Hot Kelly could not bear the thought of her lord being imprisoned, and immediately enlisted
the aid of Robin Williams' beheaded body. By inciting such lust as only she could, and luring Robin Williams' disembodied head to his aroused body, she
was able to successfully free His Serene Majesty, and gain his permission to subjugate Paisley The Moon."


*****




Kelly, after draining the blood from the Mooninites."For many years after her defeat of the King of The Moon, Robin Williams, the Queen of the Moon - Artemis Olympe, supposedly in love with His Serene Majesty - continued fighting for her people's indepence. While not objecting to being part of the Paislian dominions, she wanted Edmund to wed -she was unaware of Edmund's engagement to the Infanta of P. Mexico, and frequently was heard to call Hot Kelly a "hussy" and "Painted Jezebel". Finding this hilarious, Kelly often went into battle wearing nothing at all, further fueling her reputation as "Kelly the Hot". Though she personally drank many gallons of Mooninite blood, Hot Kelly was sore pressed. Fortunately*, Lord Smegford and his loyal crew aboard the HSMSS Epemetheus arrived in the nick of time with re-inforcements, and so Hot Kelly and the Paislian Forces won the day.

*****


*Fortunate indeed, as Lord Smegford only learned of this battle later (From this website, in fact) and was forced to retroactively introduce the Paislian Space Program, inventing an entirely new method of propulsion and recruiting several Paislians to man his vessel in the process. Good job we've those time portals, eh?