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Hail, Paisley!

By Amarantha Butterscotch
To the tune of Rule, Britannia. Note: the tune completely ruins the meter of the original poem and this parody, which is also written in iambic tetrameter. If you sing it, you may have to ruin the meter too.

When Paisley First, at He'en's command
Arose from cloth of luxury
This was the charter of the land
Admiring angels sang with glee:

Hail, Paisley! Sparkle on the land!
Paisley ever ever ever shall be grand!

Encampments not so blessed as thee
Eventually will fade and die
While thou shalt flourish lovelily
But bid them all teary goodbye

Hail, Paisley! Sparkle on the land!
Paisley ever ever ever shall be grand!

Still with more beauty shalt thou grow
As feathers crown thy shining face
As others imitate thy show
Thou bask't, delighting in thy grace

Hail, Paisley! Sparkle on the land!
Paisley ever ever ever shall be grand!

The Clevelands thee shall stifle not
But thou shalt find creative ways
To follow rules and still be hot
Quite gloriously and for all days

Hail, Paisley! Sparkle on the land!
Paisley ever ever ever shall be grand!

O, Glen, thy sense of "beautiful"
Outshines that of all mortal men
Who may be more than dutiful
But envy still thy pleasure den

Hail, Paisley! Sparkle on the land!
Paisley ever ever ever shall be grand!

The muses, still with freedom found
Shall to the Paisley Glen repair
Blest camp with matchless beauty crowned
And manly hearts to guard the fair

Hail, Paisley! Sparkle on the land!
Paisley ever ever ever shall be grand!